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Silly Christmas Songs

Christmas is about a week from today. I thought that I would post the lyrics to some silly Christmas songs that I learned as a kid. You should already know the melodies but you may not have heard these lyrics before.

First we have Randolph the Bowlegged Cowboy.

Randolph the bowlegged Cowboy had a very shiny gun
and if you ever saw it you would turn around and run.
All of the other cowboys used to laugh and call him names.
They never let poor Randolph join in any poker games.
Then one foggy Christmas eve Sheriff came to say
Randolph with your gun so bright, won't you shoot my wife tonight?
Then how the cowboys loved it as they shouted out with glee
Randolf the bowlegged cowboy, you'll go down in the penitentiary!

We Three Kings of Orient Are

We three kings of orient are
trying to smoke a rubber cigar.
It was loaded and exploded.
Now we're on yonder star.
Oh star of wonder star of light
hope you see a ghost tonight.
It will haunt you and it will scare you
all the days of your life.

Hark the Herald Angels Shout

Hark the herald angels shout
three more days 'till we get out.
Three more days of misery
in this penitentiary.
So grab your balls and grab you chains
run for the nearest trains.
Hark the herald angels shout
three more days 'till we get out.

Are You Going to Heaven?

Yesterday I watched a movie called Bridge To Terabithia. There was a scene in the movie where a girl named Leslie Burke goes to church with here neighbors. On the way back they have a discussion about Jesus and the Bible. Jess and his sister are telling Leslie that if they don't believe the Bible they will go to Hell. Leslie doubts this, but likes the story about Jesus' sacrifice anyway. Later in the story Leslie dies and there is some concern about here going to Hell because she didn't believe the Bible.

As I stated in a previous post, I believe that there is more than one heaven and there may be more than one hell. I do not believe that God will send someone to eternal torment because he or she doubted the Bible or joined the wrong religion. I believe that a just and merciful god would never do that! I do believe that getting into the highest heaven does require faith in all of the scriptures and obedience to all of God's commandments. Those who are lacking a little in faith and righteousness will go to a heaven, just not the best one. I believe that it is as hard to get into Hell as it is to get into the Celestial Kingdom. One has to work at both! Total rebellion against God may get you into Hell. Mass murder may do it.

The LDS church teaches that there are 5 steps to repentance and one of them is restitution. You must return or pay for what you stole or damaged. In the case of murder, you normally cannot bring someone back to life. So, the only way to make restitution is to forfeit you own life. In our Doctrine and Covenants it states that murderers must be destroyed in the flesh and then delivered unto Satan for buffeting. So, murderers do go to Hell, but after they have paid for their sins they get out and go to the lowest heaven.

Even if a man lived to be 120 years old, that is only a few hours of God's time. What sin could a man commit that would be terrible enough to deserve torment that lasts for millions of years? I can agree with some punishment for sins that are not repented of prior to letting someone into Heaven, but I am having a real problem with the idea of eternal torment!

Mark Twain and Brigham Young

There is a story, supposedly true, about Mark Twain and Brigham Young. They were having a debate about plural marriage. Mark Twain was trying to prove from the Bible that a man should have only one wife at a time and Brigham Young was trying to prove from the Bible that it was OK to have two or more wives at the same time. At some point Mark Twain realized that he was losing the debate, so in desperation he quoted Matthew 6:24 "No man can serve two masters...".



I don't know if this story is really true, but it definitely could be!

Vampires and Demons

As mentioned in a previous post I like watching old episodes of both Angel and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I find them both entertaining but disagree with the theology of the writers. According to the writers of these two shows vampires are demons that take over a human body. They have the memories of the former owners of the bodies, but no souls. The souls get lost somewhere. Angel is a vampire who was cursed by gypsies for killing one of them. His curse is that he does have a soul and remembers everyone that he killed while he was an evil vampire. Because he feels guilty about his evil life he tries to make up for this by helping humans and killing demons and other vampires. Part of his curse is that if he ever has a moment of true happiness he will lose his soul and become evil again. In the two shows Angel lost his soul twice and got it back twice. Vampires are supposed to be immortal but they can be killed by a wooden stake through the heart, decapitation, drinking holy water, and exposure to direct sun light. They can also be killed by fire.

What I disagree with is that a soul is not something that you have but something that you are! In Genesis Chapter 2, verse 7 It states, "And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul." Adam didn't have a soul, he became a soul after God put the breath of life into him! A living soul is a spirit housed in a mortal body and an immortal soul is a spirit housed in a resurrected body. All of the other definitions of souls that I have been given are totally wrong!

Update On Big Brother 8

On Thursday, August 16, 2007 I turned on Big Brother 8 and got a pleasant surprise when Dustin was nominated for eviction. I was quite pleased when he was finally evicted from the Big Brother house. Dustin is one of two homosexuals that got into the house this season. Now that both queers are gone I can watch the show without my stomach turning! They both disgusted me with the things that they said and did on that show! Unfortunately, they both will be back for the final episode when they vote for a winner.

I have never applied to be on Big Brother and doubt that I ever will. I would like to, but being couped up in that house with a queer could be more than I can handle. If so, he would most likely be the first person that I would try to get evicted. For the record, I don't hate homosexuals but I find much of their behavior disgusting. I still believe that homosexuality is a sin and will never change my mind on that!

Lesbians In My Favorite TV Shows

I have a membership with blockbuster online. I have been watching old episodes of the TV shows Angel and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I have enjoyed watching both shows but I do have a problem with some of the "theology" the writers have and the evolution of the character Willow Rosenberg. Willow starts out as a normal Jewish girl who has a crush on her best friend Alexander Harris. I think that it was in Season Two of Buffy that she met Oz and fell in love with him. Oz turns out to be a werewolf, but Willow stays with him anyway. In Season 4 of Buffy Oz kills a female werewolf to save Willow and that freaks him out a little. He ends up leaving Willow. She is heart broken and eventually meets Tara. By the end of Season 4 Willow is in a lesbian relationship with Tara. It is very unusual for a girl to change sexual orientation in her twenties and it was totally unnecessary for the character to make the switch! In the first 4 seasons of Buffy she is an only child. Sometime during Season 5 she gets a younger sister named Dawn. By Season 6 Dawn is 15 years old and thinks that it is OK for two lesbians to be living in the same house with her! Buffy exposes her younger sister to this sexual perversion as if there is nothing wrong with it and has it going on in her own house! I strongly object to that! It was totally unnecessary for the writers to put this garbage into the show!

They also had Willow make the switch from being Jewish to being a witch. She ends up being a good witch who helps people with her magic, but she has gotten into trouble using magic for selfish purposes. At least the writers put into the show that using magic has consequences that are sometimes hard to predict.

In both shows there is more than one Hell and more than one Heaven. Demons come from several different hell dimensions and have physical bodies. There are several different species of demons and some of them are good. I believe that there is more than one Heaven and I have no clue how many hell dimensions exist. I believe that there is only one kind of demon and those are the rebellious angels that got kicked out of Heaven. I agree with the writers that demons were on the earth long before mankind was. For some reason that I don't fully understand God allowed those fallen angels to come to Earth and to tempt mankind starting with Adam and Eve. Those demons still roam the Earth causing problems for us and they cannot be killed by a vampire slayer!

Even though I don't agree with some of what goes on in these shows, I like watching them.

More On Big Brother 8

Last Thursday I missed Big Brother 8 because I was having a problem with my cable provider and could not get the channel that it was on. When I turned it on today I was pleasantly surprised to find that Danielle was taken off the block and was replaced by Joe. Joe was voted out 9 to 1. I am glad that Joe is gone because I like Danielle and want her to stay for a long time on the show. Also, Joe is gay and I wanted him gone because of that. Let me state for the recored that I do not hate gays. However, I am quite tired of seeing them on TV and find the flaming ones quite disgusting! Dustin and Joe both do things that get under my skin and I am very glad that one of them is gone. They caused a lot of drama in the beginning and now that will be over with one of them gone. I am also glad that Dick, aka Evil, gets to spend more time with his daughter, Danielle. I hope that by the time that one of them leaves the house that they have worked out all of their problems.

There are a couple of supposedly straight guys in the house that have made comments that suggest that they may swing both ways. So, I hope that Dustin, who is definitely gay, and Nick, who may be bi, both get voted out soon.

If I ever go into the Big Brother house I am not sure how long I would last. If they put me in the house with a gay guy he would be the first one I would target unless someone else got on my nerves even more.

Are Ghosts and Magic Real?

Are Ghosts and Magic Real? I believe that the answer to both questions is yes. Let me tell you why. I have cable TV where I live and I get both A & E and the Sci Fi channel. On A & E is a show called Chris Angel, Mindfreak. I understand that a good illusionist or magician does not reveal how he does his tricks. Even so, Chris blurs the line between illusion and reality. It is hard to tell where one ends and the other begins. I have seen Chris walk through solid glass without breaking it, levitate, make other people and objects levitate, walk on water, and other strange things that I cannot explain. Chris insists that he is not using camera tricks or CGI to do his illusions and that what we see is what we get. He insists that he can really defy gravity by walking up and down a wall or crawling down the outside of a building without wires or a harness. He doesn't even use any kind of safety net or air bag in case he falls. I have also seen him dematerialize and teleport and move solid objects into and out of a painting. I do not believe that he is doing these things by the power of the Devil! However, some of his magic does seem to be real! This is why I believe that some magic is real.

I also believe that some faith healings are real because I have done them. I have given blessings to people who were sick or had some other physical problem and most of them got better faster than I would normally expect. I am well aware of the placebo effect but I doubt that this explains all cases of faith healing.

The reason that I believe that ghosts are real is because of stories that I have heard and read plus what I have seen on a TV show called Ghost Hunters on the Sci Fi Channel. These ghost hunters use all kinds of electronic equipment to get solid evidence of paranormal activity. They use night vision and infra red cameras to see in the dark, they use meters that measure the amount of electro magnetic energy in an area, and they use digital voice recorders to catch voices that the human ear may miss. They have captured with these devices voices that didn't come from a living human being. Sometimes they can tell if the voices are male or female and sometimes they can make out what the voices are trying to say. They call this EVP or Electronic Voice Phenomena. I have seen captured on film solid objects moving by themselves and I have seen a couple cases where people got knocked down by some unseen force. So, either ghosts are knocking these people down and moving these objects or we have an alien using some kind of cloaking device. I am more inclined to believe in the ghosts.

Believe what you want, but if you watch several episodes of both Ghost Hunters and Chris Angel, Mindfreak, you might be convinced that ghosts and magic are real too!

Big Brother 8

I have watched the first two episodes of Big Brother 8. Normally, I like watching the show. However, I have gotten tired of seeing queers and weirdos on TV! This season, they have a weirdo named Dick. His nickname is Evil. He is in bad need of a hair cut and he has an ear ring in each ear and in his left eye brow. He has tattoos all over both of his arms. In the house with him is his daughter, Danielle. She is a hot looking blond who is just under 21. Danielle seems like a nice normal girl. However, she hasn't spoken to her dad in the two years prior to going on this show. She can't remember why she doesn't like her dad. I do hope that Dick and Danielle work out their problems because I do know what it is like to have a daughter that will not speak to me.

Dick I can deal with. The two people that I want off the show NOW are Dustin and Joe. They are both gay and one has accused the other of giving him gonorrhea, on national TV! I stated before that I am tired of seeing queers on TV and I meant it! I plan to stop watching Big Brother 8 until they get both of these queers off the show. That is unfortunate because there are some really pretty girls in the house right now and I would enjoy watching them. However, the bickering between the two queers is just getting on my nerves and they just plain disgust me!